Writers, in order of posting: Merry, Phatgurl, kso, chickynextdoor, Kallerina, c.n.d., superdaveyboy, Merry, bsmiley (*da man!*), Merry, s.d.b., got7jesus, Merry, Kal, s.d.b., g7j, Merry, s.d.b., KG_the_winner.

One day Bob was taking his daily jog down the street, dreaming of his coffee and wishing Wendy didn't make him do this every day, when all of a sudden he tripped. Peter Furler happened to be standing nearby and started to laugh really hard. This made Bob very angry. He got up and started to chase Peter down the road, but a few yards later he started to pant for breath and had to stop. That was when he saw it...a giant billboard that said, "Are you out of breath? Thirsty? Wishing your wife didn't make you run every day? Come to Super Dave's Coffee Shop!" Well Bob was intrigued. He didn't know how to get there though, so he began to panic. "Must get to coffee shop....must get to coffee shop!!" Peter Furler was laughing at him the whole time because he knew something Bob didn't know, and that was that....

Super Dave's coffee shop was just around the corner...

so pete took off running towards the coffee shop...

But there was something very unusual about those ducks. They all could talk. And, they all professed to have the name Bob. Then they started chasing Bob around the coffee shop chanting, "Pink Bunny Bob! Pink Bunny Bob!" and Bob ran away screaming. But he still wanted his coffee, so he didn't know what to do. Should he keep running to escape this nightmare, or should he risk going back in the midst of all those ducks named Bob to get himself a soothing cup of coffee? Bob decided to...

do a double backflip across the store, and land on his feet on the counter, far above the ducks' heads. He believes the best way to do this is to get a running start, so Bob props the door open, walks to the edge of the sidewalk and starts to run towards the coffee shop door...

But as Bob took his running start, the ducks all put their cute baby duck butts in the air knowing that no one, not even Bob can resist the cuteness of baby duck butts. So fluffy and yellow. SO Bob was stopped in his tracks..powerless against the fluffy duck butts in their infinite cuteness. What was he to do!?

Bob stared at the cute duck bottoms and then thought to himself "why am I staring at duck bottoms?" and then took out one of his shot guns that he carries around often now since he lives in texas, and aimed at a duck bottom saying to himself "there's nothing like duck soup to go along with some great coffee"...

suddenly Bob saw a sign on the wall that said, NO SHOOTING THE DUCKS. Bob grinned. "Who's going to see me?" And he began to shoot the ducks. Then suddenly he heard heavy footsteps and tall shadows behind him. "Drop the gun!" Bob stopped and froze in fear. It was....

It was Riley Armstrong! He said, "Bob, what are you doing....why do you want to make soup out of these ducks...more importantly, we would anyone want a duck bottom soaking in their soup...its like your hot tub story.." and then he went into the whole comedy story that Bob tells about being in Vegas. The ducks started booing (because, let's face it, some people can tell jokes and some....never get enough sleep!). Bob (remembering Riley's promo video involving a small duck) calmly laid his gun down and said...

"Riley, if you are comedian, then I am Arnold Schwartzenegger!"
Riley exchanged a glance with the nearest duck.
"OK, that's it, I've had enough of these ducks!" Bob exclaimed. "I'm going home. Wendy will probably have coffee waiting for me there."
But on the way home Bob literally ran into Jody Davis. (Newsboys) "Ouch! Hey, watch it! Umm, Bob, do you realize you are being followed by a bunch of cute ducks?"

"Oh NO!" exclaimed Bob when he saw the ducks. He decided to take them back to Super Daves Coffee Shop since after all, it's the title of the story... when he got there he found that it was overrun by....

Antonio piñatas! (see: gotta check out the pics page on bob's site.) One of them came up to Bob and helped him calm down, saying, "It's ok, Bob. Don't be scared." Bob picked it up and noticed that it smelled of coffee. "Why do you smell like coffee? Is this like a desert mirage or something?" The piñata replied, "No. Usually we're full of candy and stuff for you and Colter. But I have COFFEE BEANS!" Bob got so excited that he....

instantly threw it at the wall in hopes of breaking it open. Unfortunately, the other piñatas started to attack Bob for hurting their friend. The ducks started to attack him too....

Bob was soon on the ground being stomped on by piñatas and ducks. He screamed "Help! Help!" SuperDaveyboy's sensitive hearing heard him outside the door. So SuperDaveyboy took out his camera and began to take pictures. After taking a few pictures, something got in Davey's way. He could no longer see Bob, just a dark blob. Davey finally remembered that he could see without the viewfinder and put down the camera to find...

a cute duck bottom! SuperDaveyBoy realised that Bob couldn't handle all those ducks and pinatas so he flew up right above bob, but before rescuing him he had to take a few more pictures for bribing material later on... David then flew down about to whack the mean pinatas and ducks off of his stalkee, when all of the sudden a pinata turned around and said...

"Run, everybody--SuperDaveyBoy is here!" So the startled ducks and piñatas scurried out the door, because we all know SDB can be a ferocious li'l bro when he's protecting Bob. (see: just kidding. dave's too sweet to be mean, even if he tried.) Bob looked at Dave and started laughing. Dave asked....

Dave asked, "Why on earth are you laughing at me?"
Bob replied, "You have something hanging out your nose!"
Dave screamed. "What!? Get me a mirror, quick!"
One of the ducks produced a mirror for him. Dave looked in the mirror only to find that...

Bob was playing a practical joke on him. Yes, even after Bob came close to being eaten by dolls stuffed with coffee beans, he still knew how to make a funny joke.
"Ahhhh Bob, you know how I feel about my self apearance! How could you make fun of me like that???" David asked.
"believe me, it was easy" replied Bob
"Well, I have the last laugh." Said David
"How?" Asked Bob
"You're sitting in duck poop" David told him
Bob began to get angry because he was wearing new pants and suddenly out of anger jumped up and...

suddenly, he realized he was in his bed and it was all just a dream. NOT ANOTHER ONE!!!!!!! he screamed. he was getting rather tired of the message board posse making him dream crazy dreams. then he smelled coffee. wendy had it brewing for him. "Oh, bob!" she said with a smile that all good wives have on old tv shows as they serve their husbands a five course breakfast that took all night to cook but you could never tell she was up all night because her hair and clothes and make-up were absolutely perfect and she was as perky as a chihuahua after eating a fajita from taco bell...."look what i made as the main course.......DUCK!!"